My take on my ex, Jared Kushner, and his wife, Ivanka Trump

I have an interesting history with Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump. Ivanka and I have some friends in common from high school, but my relationship with Jared was more significant – we were good friends in college, and we even, yes, dated briefly after graduating. (I am so sorry). Which is why I watched the couple’s involvement in the 2016 election with considerable interest – and I came to the conclusion that not only were Jared and Ivanka complicit in Trump’s election…they were enormously influential on the outcome, because they had this effect of normalizing this whole “clown show” going on around them.

“If such lovely, normal people as Jared and Ivanka are on board with Trump…how bad can he be?”

Spoiler: Bad.

But for as visible as the couple was during the election and the administration – remember Jared’s Forbes cover? – they have have more or less disappeared in the year since Biden’s election. 

Which begs the question: What are Jared and Ivanka up to now? 

Well, the pair has been loving life in sunny Miami having moved into a luxury condo complete with beachside meditation pond in a little town called Surfside, commonly referred to as “Miami’s Uptown Beachtown.” Ivanka’s been surfing, playing tennis, and hitting the links.

Jared meanwhile has been raising money for his new private equity firm and working on a forthcoming memoir. I can’t wait.

The pair has been attending Art Basel, they picked pumpkins at their town’s October Spooktacular, and have been spotted dining at noted Miami eatery Carbone with restaurateur Jeff Zalaznick. They’ve also been traveling a ton, with trips to Dubai, Israel, and Big Sky, Montana. 

Doesn’t that sound lovely.

On the less-lovely side, not all the locals in a town that voted for Biden – albeit narrowly – are exactly thrilled with the couple’s presence. And the elites that formerly formed the couple’s social circle are, shall we say – running for the hills. As one former friend of Ivanka’s said, “The stink of the family is nearly impossible to get off. How do you associate yourself with the worst, most toxic people in U.S. history?”

But, more importantly, reduced beach time might be in the cards for the couple.

On January 20, Bennie Thompson, who is the chairman of the January 6 Committee, announced that the committee is requesting that Ivanka Trump provide information regarding the violent insurrection that occurred on the Capitol during the counting of the electoral votes. They believe that due to her proximity to the president she has direct knowledge of his attempts to get what Mike Pence to overthrow the election.

Um…yeah. She probably does. 

And Chairman Thompson thinks so too.

Quote: Testimony obtained by the Committee indicates that members of the White House staff requested your assistance on multiple occasions to intervene in an attempt to persuade President Trump to address the ongoing lawlessness and violence on Capitol Hill.”

And sure, Ivanka may have been trying to persuade her father to put a stop to the violence – she doesn’t seem so off-the-rails as to endorse a coup – but that’s not the only problem facing the former golden couple. 

New York Attorney General Letitia James has subpoenaed both Ivanka and her brother, Donald Trump, Junior, as part of a civil investigation into whether Mr. Trump fraudulently inflated the value of his holdings in order to secure business loans, while also underreporting their value in order to avoid taxes. 

Look, the Trump Organization is, one might argue, corrupt AF, and we all know that Jared and Ivanka are fully aware of the ins and outs of the Trump Organization, because Ivanka has been deeply involved in her father’s business since she graduated college. She is at the very least complicit in her father’s many, many crimes. 

I guess it remains to be seen whether, as the great John Oliver recently said, and I’m paraphrasing here, the system assumes you as guilty until proven rich or lucky. Ivanka and Jared are certainly rich. I suppose we’ll find out how lucky they are.