Even if they won’t admit it, parents do have a favorite kid

EVERYONE WITH A SIBLING KNOWS IT CAN FEEL LIKE YOUR PARENTS HAVE A FAVORITE.

TURNS OUT – THEY DO, AT LEAST ACCORDING TO A NEW STUDY.

RESEARCHERS AT BRIGHAM YOUNG UNIVERSITY LOOKED AT THE RESULTS OF MORE THAN 30 STUDIES INCLUDING MORE THAN 19-THOUSAND PARTICIPANTS… AND FOUND PARENTS DO, INDEED, TREAT THEIR CHILDREN DIFFERENTLY.

FOR THE STUDY, RESEARCHERS LOOK AT FIVE KEY AREAS OF PARENT-CHILD INTERACTION:

OVERALL TREATMEANT…

POSITIVE INTERACTIONS – LIKE PRAISE AND DISPLAYS OF AFFECTION…

NEGATIVE INTERACTIONS – LIKE CRITICISM OR FIGHTING…

RESOURCE ALLOCATION – WHICH IS SPENDING TIME WITH A CHILD AND MATERIAL RESOURCES…

AND BEHAVIOR CONTROL – WHICH IS SETTING RULES AND EXPECTATIONS.

HERE’S WHAT THEY FOUND:

BIRTH ORDER MAKES A BIG DIFFERENCE.

RESEARCHERS SAY PARENTS TEND GIVE OLDER SIBLING MORE AUTONOMY, LIKE LATER CURFEWS AND MORE FREEDOM TO MAKE THEIR OWN DECISIONS.

A CHILD’S PERSONALITY CHARACTERISTICS ALSO PLAY A HUGE ROLE. 

BASICALLY, CHILDREN WHO SHOW MORE CONSCIENTIOUSNESS AND RESPONSIBILITY HAVE FEWER NEGATIVE INTERACTIONS WITH THEIR PARENTS.

THEY’RE THE KIDS WHO DO THEIR CHORES WITHOUT HAVING TO BE TOLD, FOR EXAMPLE.

AGREEABLE CHILDREN – WHO SHOW MORE COOPERATION AND CONSIDERATION – ALSO USUALLY SEE MORE POSITIVE PARENTAL RESPONSES.

THE STUDY ALSO FOUND THAT – CONTRARY TO POPULAR BELIEF – BOTH MOTHERS *AND* FATHERS TEND TO FAVOR DAUGHTERS OVER SONS… THOUGH THE CHILDREN SURVEYED DID *NOT* NOTICE THAT DISCREPANCY.

RESEARCHERS SAY THE CHILDREN WHO RECEIVE LESS FAVORABLE TREATMENT ARE MORE LIKELY TO EXPERIENCE MENTAL HEALTH AND RELATIONSHIP ISSUES.

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